These are the things that happened this weekend. Minus two. Two of the following I just made up. Because it’s Monday. And I can.

And because it’s Monday.

Which two do you think are fictitious?

(1) I rescued Elise from the above windmill. What you don’t see in this photo is the dance studio that’s connected to the windmill. Where she was practicing dance. For poms.

(2) I rescued Chris from a runaway horse carriage. Sadly, no photo exists.

I’m not that good at multitasking.

(3) We celebrated Mother’s Day (yay Mom!) by organizing a massive yard/estate sale to occur in a few weeks. What better way to show your mom some love than helping lift her load a little?

(4) This included me temporarily donning the hat of an antiques photographer. And photographing antiques.

(5) We found what we believe to be a shiny green genie’s bottle.

(6) Chris and I decided to be vegetarians for 48 hours just to see if we could.

(7) I traded in my antiques photographer hat for an events photographer hat and attended a benefit gala at a fancy hotel.

(8) I had my car valet parked for the first time ever. I felt all grownup.

(9) I tipped the valet parker fella and then pondered how much is a reasonable amount to tip a valet parker fella. I really need to keep Emily Post on speed dial for these occasions.

(10) I wore heels for a stretch of time longer than I’ve experienced in nearly three years.

(11) It hurt.

The end.